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Earlier this week, there was some confusion surrounding a now deleted tweet that seemed to indicate that husbands Billy and Seth Santoro were having relationship problems. Admitting an addiction to yourself and your loved ones is never easy. Best of luck to him and Seth as they work through this together. Best of luck to him in his sobriety!

Nothing snarky to say here. All my respect to BS and thoughts to SS. That the latter persevered is romantic in a sad way. Of course having to go to parties with free-flowing booze makes for an added difficulty, but there are people in the industry in recovery. That said, taking a hiatus might be a good idea until his recovery is on a surer footing. Unfortunately, I share your pessimism about addiction and the porn industry. The industry is littered with suicides and overdoses. The three you give, are not actually in the highest ranking professions with addiction.

This is published fact. Get them right:. So yes, it is a difficult. The industry is not friendly to recovery. Does Billy have a second career that he could fall back on if he has to step away from adult entertainment?

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I think Samuel Colt, too. When they finally stepped away they were able to pull it together. His recovery would be much easier if he worked for Titan. And I mean that as a non-insider piece of sh-t. They also escort, dance, strip, make club appearances, etc. It may be possible for Billy Santoro to remain in the sex industry, but there has to be a very good reason why. He should do everything he can to take care of himself first, even if that means leaving.

Those who appreciate his work should be able to understand and support that. The gay porn industry is very supportive and often the main family most of us have. We watch out for each other and support each other through the ups and downs. What we are simply pointing out is that recovery from lifelong addiction is a very very tough path and that it is all the more difficult if your work requires you to be almost all the time surrounded by people consuming alcohol and in places serving, smelling, advertising alcohol.

It takes a lot of willpower to overcome addiction. Being in that environment makes it even more complicated, at least in those difficult first months where you have to completely rebuild the way you lead your life and learn to resist the temptation — the same reason some people refuse to have alcohol in the house once they go sober.

I am not sure insisting BS will be fine without any consideration for the way his recovery is going to go is the best way to help him. He might — in the long run. But at the very least it is going to make all the harder right now and some comments are simply pointing out to him that he should think about other options so that his sobriety and saving his relationship be his 1 priority.

Being falsely cheery about how difficult it is going to be is not helping him. You had some good points until you dissed me for being optimistic about his recovery. Sorry, its not my style to be as negative and dreary as you. I am not dissing you for being optimistic.

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I am dissing you for setting false expectations for him on how easy it will be. Love and friendship and puppies are unfortunately not all it takes. Sometimes being a good friend does require facing the cold hard reality instead of enabling false hopes. I have seen many addicts feel ashamed that they are still tempted to use in spite of the support of the loved ones and this shame is often a cause to relapse. Ask one of the hundreds of ex-porn performers, in recovery, if they could have returned. They uniformly say no.

There is something to be said about attraction diminishing, with social media being a factor, when all these muscle queens start to sound like 14 year old middle school girls. Billy, get into an AA Recovery Program.

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There are hundreds of thousand of people who have overcome addiction through Twelve Step Programs. He has to make sure they can accommodate his issues.


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Honestly, the decision to take a sponsor is an incredibly personal one. Some do benefit from an opposite-sex sponsor, while others benefit from a same-sex one. There are also plenty of gay step meetings in major cities for those who think it makes a difference. There are even meetings for Seth if he has a need to understand and support Billy. Seth has his own problems to focus on as a partner of a addict and survivor of domestic abuse.

He should be in separate treatment to decide if he should even be in a relationship with Billy. They should put the relationship on pause until the underlying issues between them are resolved. The alcoholic and those around him all need help to recover and move on, together or apart.


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Addiction manifests in multiple ways. He will have to own up to it in his own time as well.

Addiction counselors point them out in recovery. His pornographic work sex work puts him in a high risk category.

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That is a fact in numerous studies. HE needs to be in a situation without people enabling his behaviors or permit him to act out sexually as well. His patterns of behaviors are the problem — not the substance itself. And yes, it is important to note that addicts sexually act out in numerous ways.

Any person who ends up in recovery has a period of adjustment: Mea Culpa! Glad to hear he is already in AA. I know it has worked wonders for lots of people. Step 2: Join AA. Get a addiction sponsor. Someone who: Step 3: Get a couples therapist for domestic abuse. You need sessions apart and together with that person. Best wishes to Billy on his recovery. Glad to hear Seth is supportive. What will come to light can be some harsh realities. Wishing them both strength in the days ahead. I mean, that body of his must be pretty hard to keep in shape if he drinks a lot of alcohol.

You can very well be an alcoholic and not become a blithering, fall over drunk. Compulsive behaviors are symptoms of addiction. Compulsive exercising yes it exists! I love you Billy! This is your journey and your story and your writing it! This is your journey and your story and your writing it of you and you inspire me to be better! Now, watch Jessie Montgomery not making a living getting fucked by the adorable Blake Mitchell for Helix.

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. Way to spread the wealth bud. Gee, what a bunch of haters here, the venom in the mails speak for itseld. In fact i would even add some funds for a pornstar who gave me much pleasure on screen, depending on what he needed the funding for…the best funding is of course rent them as an escort but even then the results are often disappointing…as an overaged daddy now i DO need my pornstars, my world would be much poorer without them, so they get my respect per se..