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A rather funny wordplay on crazy stuff. Here goes a bit of tongue-in-the-cheek: Also a bit of word-twisting: Apr 22, Rambling Reader rated it really liked it Shelves: May 10, Rt rated it it was amazing. Free review copy. Jane Ward, Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men: Straight white men also use white privilege to define their sexual contact with other men as not gay.
One white Mississippi politician survived a few such revelations until he was arrested for giving a blowjob to a black man. It was one thing to want his own erection taken care of by any means available, and quite another to be penetrated. Ward also analogizes sexual contact between heterosexual men to sexual contact between children, which is often characterized as not really sex.
Descriptions of both often use the same words: She also offers a fascinating example of white solidarity, where a police officer breaks ranks to protect a white man, even one seeking sex with men, from the threat of blackness. Tearoom participants often professed to love their wives, but to be getting insufficient sex from them, and tearooms were quick, inexpensive, non-entangling, and better than masturbation.
Ward also analyzes portrayals of accidental homosexuality in popular media, usually played as humorous. Dude-sex is for straight guys who are strong and relaxed enough to handle it. Mostly they use the language of service: Another chapter explores the gay porn site HazeHim. Though there are signifiers of fiction, such as the presence of lighting apparatus and recognizable gay porn stars, the key here is that the performers know how to perform not-gay homosexual sex, with repeated reference to force and to earning a place in the fraternity. This leads to a culture of sexualized violence and violent sexuality, where gay men often felt pressure from straight men to have sex.
Given the amount of homosexual contact involved in heterosexuality, Ward concludes, we need to push back against purely biological accounts and accept the possibility of male sexual fluidity. Dec 18, Matt Holsapple rated it did not like it Shelves: As a pseudo-academic, I read this and think "This is why we can't have nice things. Apr 15, Charlotte rated it really liked it. I received this book from NetGalley. Ward's book is a valuable contribution to the field of sexuality studies, and one that certainly caused quite a bit of thought on my part.
She questions some ideas that are currently taken as fact, such as sexuality being immutable and as something we're "born with" rather than as a choice, or the idea of coming out as gay as not also aligning oneself with a political and cultural movement. Ward's premise is essentially this: In the case of white straight men, Ward denotes that certain parts of homosexuality are considered an essential part of this particular genre of heterosexuality - emboldening the masculinity and str8ness of the participants.
She focuses primarily on this bro culture, the playfulness of frat culture, of hazing. She is careful to discuss aspects of assault here, as well, but also note that especially in college settings, or craigslist casual encounters, that there's a certain seeking of bro for bro that seems to only strengthen their sameness.
I'm iffy about bi-erasure in this - by saying that a sexual fluidity is just part of a straight identity, is Ward supporting internalized homophobia? At the same time, should any of us be defining what is "straight," "gay," and who should be part of that? Is it harmful to sort people into narrow categories like that, compared to saying that all sexuality is fluid and crosses borders? I think there's a lot to digest in this book that is novel and thought-provoking. I think some could potentially be harmful to queer studies, but overall I would say this is a worthwhile book.
I like a book that allows me to argue with it, and that does not simply echo my own thoughts, but makes me really think about our world and how we define it. I'll end with something Ward says in the conclusion that sums up a portion of her book: Men of color, on the other hand, quickly fall subject to misrecognized and hypersurveilled categories like 'the down low.
Instead, I have suggested that we extend to all men, both white men and men of color, the possibility that male sexualities are as fluid as female sexualities - and that all sexualities are shaped by a complex nexus of structural, cultural, and psychic forces. Aug 10, Drianne rated it liked it Shelves: There were some very interesting ideas in here, and I'd really like to read the author's book she seemed to be contemplating about social constructions of and personal shapings of sexual orientation this was only partially that book. However, the book here was repetitive -- right down to actual sentences from the introductory chapter being word-for-word echoed in the later chapters.
I also wasn't super-impressed with all of her analyses and despite her protests there did seem to be some bi-era There were some very interesting ideas in here, and I'd really like to read the author's book she seemed to be contemplating about social constructions of and personal shapings of sexual orientation this was only partially that book. I also wasn't super-impressed with all of her analyses and despite her protests there did seem to be some bi-erasure going on. Still, very interesting. Wordy as fuck but super super interesting and irresistibly quotable.
Lots to think about. I made my Kindle notes visible. I put straight in quotations because is anyone ever truly straight? But, in all seriousness, I did learn quite a bit from this book. More of applying what I already knew of straight men and actually examining the history, sociology, culture, and psychology of it was endlessly fascinating to me. I'm a huge history buff, plus I'm a psych major who also loves anthropology and sociol 3.
I'm a huge history buff, plus I'm a psych major who also loves anthropology and sociology, I was in heaven with this book. Of course, I didn't agree with everything, specifically on certain points in the sections when she stated that white men were scared of non-white men, more angled towards black men. I'd be more scared if a group of white men were coming towards me, honestly.
My favorite sections of this book were the history of heterosexuality. It was amazing to learn about how the term came around and what it originally meant, then how it was twisted into being this thing everyone should be. I'm pretty sure the Id was the thesis, Ego the antithesis, and Superego was the synthesis, but I'd have to look it up. The other section I truly enjoyed was the chapter devoted to Craigslist ads in the Casual Encounters section.
Analyzing the text and cultural appropriation done by presumably white men was very interesting to read. I did recommend this to my friend. Something I wasn't a fan of was the last chapter. It felt out of place and more of being tacked on to acknowledge the author's queerness. Unneeded, for the most part.
I skimmed it since by that part I knew where it was heading, so I didn't feel I needed it since the rest of the book was so solid. Then, in the beginning, there was a lot of focus on her. Earlier this summer I read an ARC where the author focused on herself and her experiences more than the subject of the book, so I was a bit annoyed when it started and was very pleased when it ended. Nov 10, Ron Turner rated it liked it. The Good: The Bad: One minute it's very dry and academic, like reading a sociology textbook or a study from a psychology journal.
The next minute it's so breezy it's almost flippant.
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Feel like I'm reading a middle school term paper. No need to beat me over the head with your thesis statement. The S The Good: The Sassy -- The descriptions of the sex will really make you blush. There are even X-rated pictures from porn sites. Are they often about sexual dominance? Especially when it gets carried away with rough penetration. But sometimes it really is nothing more than guys goofing off, trying to do something crazy outside their comfort zone.
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I'm openly gay and come across heteroflexible guys from all races all the time. It's not just a black thing. I've slept with guys who were otherwise happily married but enjoyed performing oral sex or being anally penetrated by a man. I've also been with straight guys who simply just wanted a good blowjob and didn't care where it came from. Studies dating all the way back to the s consistently show that it's perfectly normal for young people to sexually experiment with each other.
That's one reason why you come across a lot of Craigslist ads of straight guys looking to get off together.
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Some folks miss it. That sounds like the best job AND drinking game ever. Apr 19, Jeff rated it really liked it. This is a fascinating, thoroughly researched study of not just white, heterosexual-identified men who have engaged in homosexual sex but also sheds light on all human sexuality. Ward graciously shares her own personal experiences and understandings, adding to the depth of this subject and giving it a fuller, more sincere approach than studies that seek to take a completely neutral, sanitized point of view. Exploring the historical and societal affects and effects on the subject, Ward explores the This is a fascinating, thoroughly researched study of not just white, heterosexual-identified men who have engaged in homosexual sex but also sheds light on all human sexuality.
Exploring the historical and societal affects and effects on the subject, Ward explores the many types of circumstances in which 'straight' men may encounter what is traditionally referred to as homosexual sex, and how it has defined and created specific identities and classifications of sexuality, in general. The fluidity of male sexuality may be more evident, as proposed by the author, and may not be as rigid as it has been historically defined-- in spite of the important role rigidity plays in the social definition of masculinity. Desire, fantasy, power, as well repulsion- real or feigned, are all explored in depth.
The ideas explored here color all human sexuality and our perceptions- informed or misguided.
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Jul 28, Geoff rated it it was amazing. Academia is talking about fluidity of male sexuality perceived, lack thereof, the dangers of, etc.
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Click here to continue reading on my blog The Oddness of Moving Things. Aug 04, Anna added it Shelves: Review for this will be forthcoming at The Daily Dose. Suffice to say for now I really enjoyed her push back against the "born this way" naturalization of gay and straight sexual desires. She's also doing extremely thoughtful intersectional work around race and gender within hetero- and homo- normative cultures that persistently marginalize unruly queer sexualities.
Sep 12, Chelsea rated it really liked it Shelves: Guys, if you want to suck a cock, suck a cock. It's all good! No need to construct all of these elaborate excuses. Sep 21, Travis Wagner rated it it was amazing. This is a game changer for sexuality studies. Aug 03, Quin Rich rated it really liked it.
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The jig is up, boys! Nov 17, Marcus rated it did not like it.