Speed dating gay and straight

Finally, the night began. My cherry popper, Sandra, told me she been to a speed-dating event before, but "a straight one. I didn't remember a single thing we talked about, other than the act of speed dating itself. What followed next was a dizzying cavalcade of dames—Eleanor, a personality-deficient nurse from the Philippines; Jenny, who was from Columbus, Ohio it showed ; Jessica, who worked in "disruptive technology.

I Went to a 'Tops' and 'Bottoms' Speed-Dating Event

She was decent-looking enough, but insufferable. I had no desire to make her paradigm shift. Jessica II I'm already running out of fake names was a dietitian who had filed two of her teeth to a point, making them resemble vampire fangs. Rebecca was a satellite engineer who had written a screenplay about dating. Mindy was a banker who, in her spare time, wrote "dark-ass poetry. Jessica III was a social worker who, when I informed her that I was a writer, assumed I was going to write something snarky about our evening sorry, babe. If she could have any career in an alternate universe, she told me, it would be a rabbi or a scientist.

I said I'd still be a writer, but a more successful one. And so on and so on. Two hours later, we were done. My mouth hurt.

Love Time Out?

My head hurt. And yet, everyone around me was still eager to socialize. Obsessed with finding something and somewhere to eat, they could not stop talking about it. They could not stop talking, period.

I Went to a 'Tops' and 'Bottoms' Speed-Dating Event | HuffPost

I was out of my element; having spent most of the day beforehand in complete, vacuous silence, my mouth was not used to being used this much. I left while they were still debating where to eat, no closer to love or cunnilingus than when I'd arrived. I had, however, learned a valuable lesson: The one thing that unites us all as a people—gay, straight, trans, and beyond—is the inanity of the conversations we have with potential sexual partners. I did not care what these women did for a living. Yet I asked the question to all 20 of them. I am too much of a misanthrope to date a financial manager; the idea of having to listen to her work anecdotes makes me want to put a gun in my mouth.

I am too uptight, too difficult, too judgmental—these are the main criticisms lobbed at me by my "haters. There is nothing inherently wrong with being a financial manager. There is, however, something wrong with needlessly judging one. The group around me didn't find any fault in one another. Hell, they continued talking long after their obligation to talk had expired. The problem I had with them was squarely on my shoulders. As I rode the subway home, I surveyed my surroundings.

Everyone—male, female—looked like shit. A grown man stood in front of me wearing a backpack in which he had written the words "Killer Disco" in permanent marker. Staring at it, I realized that, unless I stopped being such a judgmental prick, I was going to be, no matter what sex I desired, fucked.

Figuratively, of course. Not literally. Follow Megan Koester on Twitter. Sign up for the best of VICE, delivered to your inbox daily.

I'd never been on a date with a woman before, I hate people, and I hate talking to people—what could possibly go wrong? The closest I came was in high school, when I asked a unibrowed record store employee out solely because he wore archaic clothes and, on the afternoon I entered his store, was listening to a Cheap Suit Serenaders LP. Newsletters are the new newsletters.


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More VICE. VICE Elsewhere. Meeting your special someone shouldn't be anything but a comfortable and relaxed experience. Creating a private club atmosphere while recognizing our clients are also our product - we reward lovely daters with discounts and complimentary events and refuse service to anyone we don't think you'll fancy meeting. This is where being lovely has it's perks! SpeedNY GayDate. Add to Calendar. View Map View Map. Find out more about how your privacy is protected. Feb Sales Ended.

Event description. Description A low key, sophisticated approach to gay dating in NY.

Gay Men Speed Dating J. Kinahan's - February 12th Ages: Read more Read less. Date and Time Tue, February 12, 8: Map and Directions View Map. Event Ended.

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